Sunday, July 5, 2009

Talk about pressure

So this is it... our "Hail Mary" cycle. The 40-yard pass to the end zone in the final seconds of the game when we are down by four points.

I am now 3 DPO. AF is due next Thursday, July 16. And DH and I know that if we don't get our BFP naturally this time, the next cycle will have a huge price tag. Financially, emotionally, and physically.

It feels good to know that we have a plan, a more proactive approach if and when AF shows her ugly mug. But we secretly hope to be one of "those people" who end up pregnant right before starting treatment. The pressure of $1000+ riding on this month's conception.... it gives you pause, I'll say that much.

In the meantime, I got a nice email from our nurse. First the awesome news -- she has a coupon for a free vial of Follistim, and she's letting us use it! That will save us $250 in meds next month. Hooray! She also attached a calendar of my injections and appointments. At my old clinic, only the IVFers got their own calendars, so I was feeling pretty frickin' sweet when I opened it.

Here are the major dates as determined so far, for posterity. (No, there won't be a quiz. Unless you're really an overachiever and would like one. In that case I'm happy to write one for you. Just speak up.)

July 16 - Day 1 - AF arrives
July 17 - Day 2 - Bloodwork and baseline ultrasound
July 18 - Day 3 - 75 IUs of Follistim (25 IUs less than before to lower risk of multiples)
July 19 - Day 4 - 75 IUs of Follistim
July 20 - Day 5 - 75 IUs of Follistim
July 21 - Day 6 - 75 IUs of Follisitm
July 22 - Day 7 - 75 IUs of Follstim
July 23 - Day 8 - Bloodwork and ultrasound to check follicle growth
(future protocol determined based on results of Day 8)

I can't really say how I'm feeling about all of this. My initial reaction would be to say I'm handling it really well, not bitter (at the moment) about having to go through this instead of just buying a bottle of wine and getting knocked up the easy way. It's a huge relief to be getting the help we (I) obviously need to conceive, and I'm both grateful and excited. But I've also been rather grumpy lately. It's either because I have a lot of repressed IF anxiety, or because I've run out of M&Ms.

Your guess is as good as mine.


  1. Awesome on the coupon...and I'll cross my fingers you don't even need the calendar...though I make no promises because my finger-crossing isn't good for much.

    M&Ms are a much better bet.

    Good luck.

  2. That was great of your nurse to do that. sounds like a good place. I am sending you much luck, positive thoughts, baby dust, and I have everything crossed for you. If I think of anything else I will let you know. :)

  3. I hope you don't need that coupon, but I'm sure it helps knowing it is there. You and I are on the same schedule in terms of 3DPO, AF expected date, etc. That is just weird. Is it because there is finally so much sun? If AF comes for me then it will be IVF #2. I don't hold out much hope that it will work this cycle au natural, but you never know. Best of luck!

  4. As much as I would love to type through - hey, this is the cycle, throw that timetable, I know that this would not be realistic at all!

    Am glad that you have a hope for this cycle, and that you have a future will be earned / re-earned, reproductive span can't....All the best!

  5. You do hear about those miraculous pre-treatment bfps, though usually 3rd or 4th person. I want to hear of one directly. Go, Sunny! But if not, at least you've got a plan. And a coupon.

  6. I'd love for you to be one of "those" people. Oh and I'll do the quiz but only if it is open book.

  7. Add me to the list of people crossing fingers and toes for you.

  8. Hoping with you, and crossing all the crossables...

  9. OMG, what pressure! I have just blogged about how Cowboy and I have been having difficulty 'trying' and that is with much less pressure than you guys. Goos effort!

    The plan sounds good, but I hope you don't need it! :)

  10. Apparently, I need to read your blog more often! I didn't know you were heading back to treatments already! YAY for that! My third IUI will be next weekend. The last failure was a HUGE blow. It was on my third IUI that I got pregnant with Faith. I'm not sure if that brings me comfort or completely stresses me OUT!

    Keep me posted, girl! Fingers crossed...


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